Throughout my 26 years of living in Singapore, I had never identified myself as a gay man. I was suspicious but I didn't have the courage to step out as one. My trip to Sydney 7 years ago gave me the first opportunity to be myself and through these years, I have grown and matured, loved and fallen out of love, and now, am happily married to a wonderful man I call my best friend and my love.
Many things have changed, but two things hadn't ... my dislike of clubbing and stage fright ... However, being in Singapore now, makes me feel like a tourist, maybe because I am introduced and "celebrated" as one, and as a tourist, one tends to explore and experience things that they don't usually want to do back home. It would thus come as a surprise to many of my close friends back in Sydney that I would have my definitive clubbing experience here in Singapore, not a place many people would associate with the cream of the world.
I don't have many gay friends in Singapore. Before last Friday, I had only a handful but now, I have more than two handfuls, and I have to start using my toes already. I met Cecilia, a vibrant lady at my friend's wedding, and after being probed by everyone at the wedding because I was a newbie from Sydney, I was invited (or rather cajoled) to go along for another Karaoke session. During mid-session, Cecilia approached me and "commanded" that I go along with her to a "happening" place in Singapore, called "Happy". I had read about the club Happy from the Asian gay website "Fridae", and as curious as I was about the place, I wasn't enthusiastic enough (and maybe courageous enough) to walk in there and see what the difference is with the clubs in Sydney. So, when the opportunity came, I seized it, though Cecilia didn't know that I was gay (though she had her suspicions).
When we entered "Happy", we were greeted by thick smoke and was later introduced to many of Cecilia's friends, who were mainly passing acquaintances at that point because clubs are not the ideal place to meet new people, because of the high decibel level of music emission. We watched a drag show which was performed by local performer, Hossan Leong, who treated us to a live performance and a comic skit as well. It was very authentic and professionally done. After that, since I had a headache, I chose to leave early.
I met up with two of Cecilia's friends, Stephen and Kris two nights later and went to another club called "Why Not". It was not as fashionable as "Happy" but the ambiance was enhanced greatly by the personal touch provided by the extremely hospitable owners, a pair of twins from HK. About half an hour into our arrival, we were advised to turn around to a small stage, where we were greeted by a plus size Chinese drag queen doing a rendition of Madonna's "Hanky Panky". She was wearing a black corset-like outfit which cut high above the thighs, occasionally revealing her black panties, which made her look like a misfit, but I had to applaud her for her courage in stepping out and doing what she does. Just when I was about to dismiss the whole show, next stepped this voluptuous lady in shimmering sequined gown, resplendent in pink, complete with huge eyes, sexy lips and huge blonde hair, not unlike Mariah Carey. She put on one of the best drag performances I had ever witnessed, mouthing and making fun as she did her rendition of an over the top "Over the Rainbow" with full on comic antics, easily tickling the crowd. She stepped off to rousing applause and the final diva took on the stage and did another wonderful performance of a Tina Turner song, which was just as fun as the second diva, but lacked the "X-Factor".
After the show ended, the first and second diva took on the stage and unknown to us, asked for "volunteers" down the stage. I use the word "Volunteers" with the inverted commas, because it is usually our friends "volunteering" (or sabotaging) us, rather than us being free spirits. Being a "foreigner", I was of course picked to be one of the three. As I mentioned earlier, I suffer from stage fright but somehow, the new experience and the look of fear on my Thai friend Kris' face, inspired me to step out of my shadow and have a little bit of fun.
I was teased about my "bosoms" as the second diva compared to her stuffed breasts, but I took it all in good humor. The funny thing was she even asked if I was straight or gay and I remembered the smallish crowd roared when I imitated the noise she made for "gay", complete with the broken wrist. The third volunteer was an "ang-moh" from Britain, who was unfortunately, the only Caucasian in the club.
The first thing we were asked to do was to select a item amongst the three that they had, the broom (with complete centre parking - as in the brushes in the middle of the broom are damaged and skewed to both sides), a mop or a toilet brush. Being the clean freak I am, and the lucky person to be selected to pick first, I chose the cleanest of the three (some things don't change even when we are on holidays), and they joked about the mop being the same one used for the toilet after Kris picked it. We were then told that we would play a new amateur band, where I would play the guitarist (the broom), Kris would be the singer (the mop), and the Brit, the drummer, with the toilet brush and pails as drums. The music started and I was made a fool because I didn't recognize the bass from the "electric guitar". They started all over again and I threw away all inhibition and did my best performance as a rock guitarist, complete with gyrations from the hip and swinging of my hair. Kris didn't fare that well and he was substituted with the Brit, because the divas complained he was a little too "wooden". They also came over and complimented my impromptu performance, which they said was "sexy" and how they wished they were the broom. It was exhilarating and funny at the same time because I was letting myself go, and the audience was lapping it all up and I could see Stephen and our girlfriend cheering and laughing on.
After the song ended, they asked the audience if we could go and like any other, they said "No", which meant more. We were then asked the most embarrassing question, "Are you top/bottom?". Kris was the first to be asked, and he shot a confused look at the diva, clearly misunderstanding the question, and not offering any answer, so they changed the question to "Choose top/bottom". They both chose top and I was the unfortunate last to pick, so I decided to play along and said "Since they are all playing top, I will have to play bottom then." and was greeted by loud cheers and applause and hurried fanning by the divas, who thought my answer was "too hot to handle".
They eventually decided to delegate, and the Brit was chosen "Bottom", I was given "Top" and Kris was both "Top/Bottom". I was a little worried that they might get us to do something weird, but it turned out that the delegation would mean which piece of garment would have to go. Not only that, but we had to disrobe while dancing to some sexy music. I thought I got away with the top, and so I did my best impersonation of a stripper, and turned my back before stripping off my top. That was when the shyness crept back in, but was probably enhanced with the cheers from the crowd, who apparently said "Take it all off" (which I learnt from Stephen later), which I joked that they probably said "Ugh! Put it back. Put it back." For those of you who are wondering, Kris did not take it all off, he got away with pouring tequilla down our throats, but thankfully, he poured very small amounts into mine because he knew I wouldn't be able to handle it.
This account might make me sound egoistical, but I am not. What I discovered is that if we allow ourselves to drop our guard once in a while, we might end up having one of the best times of our lives, and this is undoubtedly one of my best, because I was able to let go of my inhibition for once, and just enjoy. It was like facing my fear of stage fright and conquering it for a night. I don't want this to be a catalyst for more of such adventures, but I was delighted that I have at least, this sweet memory to remember it of.
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