Thanks to everyone who commented on my previous post, which seemed to be quite a "hot topic", my dear friend from Canada wrote me a rather passionate letter warning me about the potential dangers of just being who I want to be, which seemed to be the reflection of thoughts from some of you.
He was unable to post a comment because he probably didn't have a gmail account, but this is what he wrote:
Some people wrote to you to say that you should not be concerned if your conscience is clear and you are simply doing what is good. Sorry, I disagree with them. Who is going to back you up if no one is looking and if you had not planned ahead of time. From experience I can tell you that most people prefer to remain "uninvolved" and out of any kind of controversy. Truly, you want to help those in need but you also want to protect yourself.
One of my friends was sentenced to time in minimum security prison because he felt sorry for someone, tried to help them and was accused of sexual misconduct. I know the guy, know how he tries to help everyone and also that he would not have committed sexual misconduct because this was a woman accusing him and he is gay. Any way, I was not present so could not vouch for him and others would not get involved. The only thing I could to to help was visit him in prison. Now he is out but always has someone with him when he is helping anyone out. One of my other friends was accused of misconduct but I was actually there and able to defend them against those who were accusing him. There are a number of other examples I could speak of but my main point is that you have to be careful, regardless of your intentions. Intentions only get a person so far so, please don't be naive enough to think that a clear conscience is protection for accusations. Keep in mind that I am speaking not of just sexual misconduct; physical abuse, emotional abuse, are also accusations that people are having to face. I am not suggesting that a person live alone in a cave, just that they be careful to protect themselves from unjust accusations.
I am really thankful to Makary for bringing this to my and now everyone's attention. I totally believe that there are such true cases in life, because the society does certain communities of people who are perceived to be more vulnerable. If a woman that I am helping suddenly accuses me of sexual assault even though I am innocent, and no one is around to witness, who would the judge believe?
My dilemma though now is when to help or do we just stand by and watch it all happen? There is a current case in Australia where a Muslim was jailed in suspicion of assisting in the foiled London bombings recently and was held with no actual charge of about a month. The Australian Federal police and government claimed that they had proof that his mobile SIM card was found in his cousin's car that exploded. It was since discovered that it was a lie, and the SIM card was about 300 km away. This is the first case that tests the new Australian anti-terrorism laws and now that this debacle has put these laws into the spotlight, the prime minister is saying that "When it comes to terrorism, it is always better to be safe than sorry."
I know that this is not entirely linked, but it does reflect the fear that we possess for our fellow beings, and it is our leaders who helped shape the attitudes of the world. What messages do I, as an adult, want to pass down to my younger generation, in particular, my nephew and niece? When it comes to helping others, is it really better to be safe than sorry, or does it only restrict to us, as single men? What can we do to change the impressions of the world?
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