Parenting

Saw this ad yesterday morning on the sign board in front of one of the schools, not far away from my office and I must say it is rather strange but refreshing. I snapped the photo and immediately shared with the rest of the girls in my office. "It has moved" came one response. Puzzled I questioned, and it appears so that it used to be pinned to the back of the doors in the ladies restroom and it has now been "promoted" to an official notice board.

We had a small discussion and wondered if the description of appearance referred to the desired mother or the actual childbearer. Cynical as always, we came to the conclusion that she probably wanted a white baby, and this was the most politically correct way to place definitions.

John and I had always thought of having a child of ours, but it is not as if we could advertise like this. Firstly, it wouldn't work because none of us possess a womb, and secondly Australia prohibits any gay adoption. Not surprising, because they seem to always pick up reports that support their hypothesis that "Gay parents will always rear gay children". What they don't understand or the point that they seem to miss that most of our parents (of gay children) are actual heterosexual identifying, and we all had a very normal heterosexual upbringing, and since gay marriage and parenting is such a "New Age" phenomenon, where do they get their statistics from.

The other thing I find it ridiculous that they object to gay parenting/adopting is the belief that we will be bad parents. Did it ever cross their minds that this is a choice that we actually make. We can have sex as much as we want and never once will ever run the risk of being pregnant, so do they think that we are pushed into being parents like people who are knocked up after a one night stand. We understand the incredible responsibilities, and our desire to have a child is not the result of a one night consequence. Like women in the workforce with all eyes watching, mouths and minds ready to make a criticism and condemn us forever, don't you think we will work twice, thrice, a million times as hard to make sure that we do not fault?

My dear friend Joe looks at his partner and I when we play with our friend's twins that it is such a pity that we will never have children of our own. I know we lament that ourselves, and though John is a willing partner, he won't even entertain the thought as long as I am not out to my parents. It is a difficult decision, to have or not to have. At the moment, I am happy just to spend time with babies and then giving them back, but I always wonder what kind of a parent I would make. Will I suffocate the child with my love? Will I be a good parent that is loving and supportive regardless of the life choices my child eventually wants to make? See that I have the same insecurities as every parent?

I can take on more babysitting responsibilities and that might help to satisfy my needs for a while, but for every heterosexual and homosexual couple out there who yearn to have a child, I understand the need for someone to share our love with, just like heterosexual couples who are lucky to have children do. We are built for love, and I can only hope that the world will understand us someday, that love will breed love, not just homosexual or heterosexual, but happy children and human beings.